What Disturbs Me Most About Popcorn is its Distinct Lack of Human Emotion

Words by Emmie Rae

Pictures by Amy Blomberg

Published on June 21, 2013

There are all these
Running in circles
Checking out asses
I am sitting on a
A muscular guy is
‘Hey Deborah wanna go to
the Quay after zumba tonight?’
Deborah is breathing
She has done like 9
I think: Go Deborah
‘Can’t. Got a colonic
appointment in Bondi.’
I think: Woah
The muscular guy says
‘Farrrk’ and continues running

I will ride the shoulders
of these people, I will live as a worm in their stomachs, I will
whisper in their ears ‘Why don’t you turn the fucking lights on’
during intimate moments of their sex-cation in Noosa

Then we will be lying
nearby, on deckchairs, at some real fancy place with free
cocktails, free cocktails in pineapples (!) checking in on
Facebook: Livin Da Vida Loca at: Paradise. We will laugh together
thinking of Ricky Martin’s hips, feasting on pineapple together,
winking at each other and

I am drowning in this
hotel waterfall
I am breathing heavily
down the neck of you
I stole these waterproof
ponchos from hot dollar
This is how much I
fucking love you

But all these people
never stop running and sweating and drinking and eating spinach
leaves for lunch, complaining about not feeling full

‘Je-en I drank green tea
and ate THIS  (gesticulates wildly) MUCH spinach and I am STILL.

There is a large pool I
saw in a film

The characters jumped in
from high above — lets do this together — let’s hold one another as
thousands of bubbles explode off our bodies

You will say ‘I feel like
we’re in a movie!’
Forgetting you are deep
under water
Swallowing warm
Bursting through the


Romance is lost in the
workplace. It is probably an occupational health and safety issue
like wearing sandals or leaving a banana peel on the floor

Dear co-workers,

There is dedicated river
space for you to scream into and a voice within the river will
shout life advice back:

‘Look Peter, if you stop
using obscure French phrases in general conversation maybe you’ll
get laid.’


‘Your strudel sucks
Trudy! Sorry! You will never be on Masterchef! Although your Jamie
Oliver / Matt Preston fan fiction is quite arousing! Perhaps
consider studying literature!’

I will study you,
studying me
Floating on a surface
only we can see
These people are all
running in circles
And they cannot hear a

Emmie Rae is a writer from Sydney and the internet at emmie-rae.tumblr.com.